When Is It Unhealthy To Let Your Child Sleep With You?

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My boyfriend sleeps in the same bed with his 11 year old son every night. My boyfriend won’t let me sleep over at his house. Sometimes I feel concerned that he is not exposing his son to traditional relationships between a male and female. In other words, if this continues, should I worry that maybe some day the son will turn gay?

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9 Responses to “When Is It Unhealthy To Let Your Child Sleep With You?”

  1. jemimaje says:

    Why would you have a boyfriend who could care less about sleeping with you? Lose that loser.

  2. Anonymous says:

    I don’t think it is necessarily unhealthy. But I would be a bit worried that your boyfriend is not instilling any independence to his son. I think having an occasional sleep over is fun and bonding. But sleeping every night, well, I think it would be very off-putting too.
    I don’t blame you for being jealous I would be too. But I honestly wouldn’t be in a relationship for 3 years with someone who couldn’t couldn’t give me a bit more commitment.
    Good Luck!

  3. ? Yanamamo ? says:

    It’s quite common for family members of all ages to sleep in the same bed in Europe and no one gives it a second thought.
    You understand that since they are family, this is not intended to be as you put it, an exposure to any particular lifestyle?
    And, no, it’s not OK for you to be jealous of this, but it is OK for you to wonder why your BF has no sexual desire for you.

  4. mama t! says:

    there are so many opinions on this and i will get thumbs down like crazy. aside from this 11 year old still sleeping with his father (which i personally think is a bit strange) as babies, it is also unhealthy in the long run. some mothers think that their babies simply cannot sleep without them, the truth is, it’s the other way around. mommys are just afraid of something happening in that crib that they wont see/hear/or be able to stop. and thats human nature, its mommy nature. but after so long, it becomes a dependency issue for the parent, not the child. and plus, trying to get your kid in a crib after sleeping in a big soft bed is like going from the hilton to the super 8 motel.
    another thing- some mommas say that they are afraid of sids, or cot death, so they want their babies to sleep with them. but on the other side of that, the chances of a baby dying from sids are actually higher in an adult bed! with parents that can roll over, heavier blankets, pillows, etc.
    anyway… thumbs down if you want, its just my opinion. there is no right or wrong answer to this. and im not judging any one’s parenting.

  5. Zabes says:

    Maybe your boyfriend doesn’t want his son to think that shacking up is okay. Sleeping with your boyfriend in front of his child wouldn’t exactly teach him about traditional relationships. I applaud your boyfriend for his good judgement (as far as not sleeping with you in front of the child). Although it’s time to let the kid sleep in his own bed.

  6. Anonymous says:

    Why would you worry if the boy turns out gay in the first place? I do not see how this should concern you in any way ! Your boyfriend probably loves his son and doesn’t have a “twisted mind” ! Let them bond and you should worry only, if your boyfriend abuses him !
    Edit: I knew from the beginning that you were jealous. I don’t think you should worry, to the contrary, you should speak to your boyfriend “what exactly is bothering you as a woman”.

  7. I have an answer ! says:

    None of your business and being “gay” is not a decease you inherit by just sleeping with your father. The wording of your question is wrong !

  8. Dropides says:

    That’s very creepy. I would be more concerned that their may be something inappropriate going on.

  9. Rebecca S says:

    That kid is way too old to be sleeping with his dad. If this was a newer relationship I’d tell you to find someone that isn’t so weird.

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